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WTF Friday: When Bad Theology Meets Bad Tattoos March 3, 2011

Posted by J. in Genius.

Yesterday morning, I was amusing myself with pictures of cats captioned with Charlie Sheen quotes, when I stumbled upon this picture.  And it being WTF Friday, I figured I’d share because it’s wrong on so many levels, besides the obvious one of just being an unforgivably ugly tattoo.

First of all, the fuckwad in this photo (not Charlie Sheen, by the way) was arrested for beating up another guy back in 2009.  Naturally, he claims the beatdown was justified.  What could justify beating another human being into the hospital, you ask? Did the other guy key his car?  Did he insult his mother?  Of course not.  Turns out the other dude was acting all gay and shit and that’s just not cool, man.  He’s got all the justification you need right here, man.

Under "abomination" in the dictionary you find this guy's picture.

His justification comes directly from God, man.  It’s in the Bible, man. 

Not surprisingly, this jackwagon clearly failed to continue his careful study of Torah.  If he’d read on, he would have very quickly come across the admonition, “Do not lacerate your bodies for the dead, and do not tattoo yourselves.  I am the Lord.”  That’s Leviticus too,  chapter 19, verse 28 this time.  Is that irony?  It’s certainly ignorance, not to mention sheer laziness.

Serious laziness at that.  In my Bible, I didn’t even have to turn the page to find it.  I could see it just by glancing.  It did not take an exhaustive search to locate the passage where God takes umbrage with tattoos.  Now, if he’d have had that passage tattooed on his arm, that would be irony, right?  I only ask because irony confuses me sometimes.

A somewhat blurry scan of Poops' Bible. The box on the left: his tattoo. The box on the right: "No tattoos." Oops.

I wonder why he singled out that bit of Leviticus to have permanently inked into his skin and not any of the other prohibitions outlined in that particular book.   “You shall not bear hatred for your brother in your heart,” just doesn’t have as much of a badass ring to it, I guess.  That’s from Leviticus 19:17, and I still didn’t have to turn the page to find it.

WTF, man.  You’re so stupid on so many levels that you make the Baby Jesus cry.

I have to go lie down now.  Between this guy and Charlie Sheen, I’m just exhausted.


1. Karen - March 4, 2011

Fabulous, Jen!! I love the way “Christians” quote the parts of the Bible they like, and ignore the rest. Haven’t seen a woman going off by herself when she is “unclean” or partaking of a ritual bath to cleanse herself either. Or not eating lobster or pork. I guess it’s “Pick-And-Choose Christianity” that they practice.

Josh - June 13, 2013

just got to work out your on salvation with fear and trembling….

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